101 - friday

today was my last day at la masseria. it was surprisingly bittersweet to walk out of my office knowing it was over.  in the nine months since the restaurant opened, I have been an integral part of the management team.  sometimes it was exhilarating.  other times, it was frustrating and exhausting.  I am grateful to have been a part of helping establish a small but well-loved new york restaurant here in italian restaurant-saturated rhode island.   the experience sharpened my business sense, it exposed me to a new industry, it bolstered my (adult! real world!) confidence and expanded my professional network.

oh, and on wednesday night, we won a huge award: best new restaurant, the highest accolade for which we were eligible at the rhode island monthly's annual best of ri awards.

I asked the owners to take a picture with me tonight before I left, but they refused.  "you'll come back," they said.  pictures are for goodbyes, not see-you-laters.  (they also offered a discounted-meals bribe if I stay close and in touch.  I can handle that.)   

onwards and upwards to the next big thing!

100 - thursday

one hundredth day!  wow.  t comes home in less than a week (!!!!!!) and I have been walking around smiling ear to ear like the village idiot.  even though I won't see him for a few weeks, just looking forward to knowing he is back on us soil has me SO excited and relieved and uncontrollably giddy.

speaking of countdowns: my summer semester finishes on tuesday.  our research team has to make an hour-long presentation to our client organization, our peers, and the summer institute staff.  I get pretty nervous presenting, but luckily I feel so comfortable with my team that it shouldn't be too bad.  to keep my eye on the prize, becca made me this hilarious/awesome countdown calendar.  it's hanging from a doorway in the middle of our apartment.  I love it.

next tuesday is also proooobably right about the same time t will be heading  home (!!!!!!).  I am so lucky - I have wonderful things to look forward to in the coming week and month.

99 - wednesday

tonight I got to see my oldest friend in the whole world, hilary.  she is twelve days older than I am, and we've pretty much been bff's since the day I arrived.  when we were in third grade, her parents moved the family to new york, but we've still seen each other every summer on the cape.

now that we're grownups with lives and jobs (our parents weren't much older than we are when they all met!) it's been harder to get everyone together.  she moved to san francisco after college and we haven't seen each other in two years.

her parents bought an awesome cottage on plum beach and are rebuilding/renovating it top to bottom.  they still live in ny (for now!) but will retire here once it's finished.  she flew in from ca to see them, and we got to spend a few hours catching up.  it was such a nice treat to see her.  it really doesn't matter how long we go between visits - we always pick up just where we left off.

98 - tuesday

calm before the storm? or, all calm, no storm?

the end of july is here (slow down, life! ahh!) and oddly, no panic attack.  maybe it's because I planned for it, or maybe it's the amount of ice cream I've been eating.  either way, I'm totally relaxed going into the last few days of my summer semester.  last night, at a formal reception for the program, I had the audacity to tell the department chair that I felt like I was "getting away with something" because my research team has been working together so well and we're (collective gasp!) running ahead of schedule on our final project.

I don't have a picture for today.  wait. nevermind.  she'll do.

ahem.  that's right, boys and girls, my loan check came in the mail today.  I sure can't dine out every evening - I'm still a poor grad student, but at least I won't starve - or going on lavish shopping sprees.  it just means I no longer have to worry about the fact that my rent is due on friday.  phew.

(I would have loved to take a picture of that check, but you know, personal security.  some things just aren't meant for the internets.)

97 - monday

people, I don't know what you expect from me this week.  I have so much to look forward to in the next 10 days that I can hardly sit still: my very brave and handsome boyfriend is coming home from his deployment (3 months feels like 3 YEARS).  my last day of work at a job I have simultaneously loved and hated.  the presentation of my summer research practicum.  deadlines, milestones.

my college girlfriends bought me a subscription to real simple for my 23rd birthday, and it's something I've really come to look forward to every month.  however, because we moved, I didn't get my july copy.  huge kudos to the customer service reps at the mag for supplying me with a (free! no questions asked! expedited mail!) copy of last month's edition.  now I have a good mini-reward waiting for me to finish writing my final research report.  it's definitely way less awesome than all the other things I'm looking forward to (yeah... I'd rather see t than read a magazine) but I'm taking pleasure in the little things this week.

96 - sunday

today is a perfect summer morning: it started out cool and breezy, blanketed in big shadows and the sound of birds.  now it's hot but not sticky, and the grasshoppers are buzzing lazily in the backyard grass.  I called out of work because really, I couldn't imagine spending this glorious morning doing anything other than cooking a delicious breakfast and enjoying my coffee in my pj's.

95 - saturday

I spent the entire day with my research team today.  nearly nine straight hours of work.  it's a damn good thing we like each other and get along so well, otherwise I'm quite sure we'd have had a casualty by now.

we had a department-wide grad-student pot-luck backyard-BBQ (too many conjunctions? ask the English MAT students) tonight.  our hostess with the mostess, Maggie, is in the MAT program.  her roommate babysits for the most adorable girls in the universe, who quickly became the stars of the party.

hula hoop stars

though I'm convinced the local mosquito population got the best of me tonight, it sure was nice to relax and know that everyone at the party was as stressed as I was but still managing to have a great time.  there's a certain degree of solidarity in socializing under stress that somehow levels the playing field.  I feel very confident in facing the obstacles that stand between us now and the end of next week.  that, and I have the greatest reward of all waiting for me when I'm done: t is coming HOME!

bring it on, research practicum! it's another day closer to august :)

94 - friday

there are two main libraries on campus: the rock and the sci li (sciences library).   during the school year, the basement of the sci li is open 24/7 (I may have had a few sleepovers there during the peak of thesis writing).  it's fun, social, and the space is designed to encourage active collaboration.  it can also be wildly distracting if you're trying to just hunker down and get some reading done.  for that, there is the rock.  the rock is the humanities research library.  it's quiet, gets lots of natural light, and has more of a classic-library feel.  it's one of my favorite places on campus.  yes, I'm a nerd.

the rest of the sci li is a cold cement tower looming over campus.  the floors are filled with metal stacks of science books.  the "corrals" are tiny, unbalanced wooden desks with uncomfortable molded-plastic chairs reminiscent of a high school cafeteria.  you could not pay me to study there.

oh, so what's the magical place in today's pictures?  yeah.  apparently in my year between graduation and re-enrolling as a grad student, brown gutted the third floor and turned it into the "science center."  there are SIX group study rooms.  smart boards.  open meeting space.  a conference room.  a research presentation lab.  computer stations.  programmable thermostats.  beautiful, self-contained corrals with comfortable, ergonomic chairs.  A KITCHEN.  I think my reaction to this stunning transformation scared my research teammates a bit.

I am going to be mighty sad when the undergrads come back in the fall and I can no longer use this place at my leisure.  (psst.  you can find me here in some capacity every day this coming week until our final report is complete.)

93 - thursday

I signed up for grad school because I'm genuinely interested in what I'm studying.  the same is presumably true of the rest of my cohort.  unfortunately, our summer research practicum demands an intense amount of work in a comically short amount of time, and has made it easy to forget why we're here.  we're young, and life should be fun.

it just so happens to be providence restaurant week ($13 lunch! $30 3-course dinner!).  so, after a long afternoon of coding data and revising memos, my team and I decided to find some food.  good food.  on the cheap.

mere found this handsome doggie outside of loie fuller's

we tried for loie fuller's, a french restaurant in the west end.  when we arrived the dining room was nearly empty and they appeared to have only one woman filling the role of hostess, server, busgirl, and food runner for the entire joint.  we waited twenty minutes to put our names in, and after another ten without being seated, we left.  it's too bad because my parents love this place and I've been meaning to try it.  I'll give them a pass on it being an off night, and try again another time.

we wound up eating at nick's on broadway, which has THE best breakfast ever (ok, second-best to portage bay) but where I'd never been for dinner.  they weren't participating in restaurant week but we still had a reasonably priced meal and lots of gut-busting, stress-smashing laughs.  our research sure is stressful, but maybe being a grad student is fun after all!  

92 - wednesday

oh, hi there heaven on a plate.

I finally went to the grocery store last weekend, so I have oodles of good ingredients just begging to be savored.  HOWEVER, it's been a long day (do they still count as long if they're all long?) and the last thing I felt like doing was cooking real food.

fortunately for lazy hungry me, it takes just two of these ingredients (seven stars olive loaf and narragansett creamery's atwells gold cheese) (and a quantity of butter that would make paula deen blush) to produce the best grilled cheese on earth.

atwells gold tastes like young parmesan - it has a sweet tangy bite to it but isn't as dry or hard as an aged parmesan.  creamy, oozing cheesy goodness meets salty, crusty kalamata-studded olive loaf.  meets ice cold beer.  oooohhhh my goodness.  did someone say something about a long day?  can't hear you.  kinda busy over here in taste bud nirvana.

91 - tuesday

there's a mouse in the house! eek!

our mouse apparently looooooves brown sugar.  

we are hoping he also looooooooves skippy peanut butter.  

our pantry, looking as mouse-proofed as ever. 

isn't being a grownup and having to deal with rodent infestation on your own (without a brave dad or brother) fun times??  apparently I'll be filling those shoes when the time comes.  says becca, "if we catch a mouse while you're in class I'm going to leave it on the counter for you to throw away when you get home.  I refuse."  greeeeat.

90 - monday

remember when I ran a marathon?

remember when I signed up to run another?

most marathon training plans are 4 months long.  in the past, I've used the runner's world ultimate beginner plan for half marathons (9-wk) and the full (16-wk).  surprisingly, I started looking forward to my tuesday hill workouts and my thursday speedwork.  I could feel myself constantly improving.  a 16- or 18-miler on sunday morning started feeling natural (!) and comfortable.  it just worked.

since I signed up for the newport marathon in october, I've been running 4 times.  that's right, 4 times.  I'm supposedly 2 weeks into my 16-week program (I even bumped up the intensity to the RW intermediate program) and I can't manage to get my rear end out the door in the morning to run.  by the time I am awake and feeling restless, it's 90+ degrees outside and too humid to move, and then I convince myself that I can't run.   to keep to the plan, I should have run 12 miles yesterday.  instead I barely squeaked out 5 because it was so hot and humid.  this is simply unacceptable.

no more excuses.

my post-marathon running vacation is over.  time to get serious again.  and to dust off my running shoes! my goodness, how pathetic do they look gathering dust in that dark corner of my closet? I paid top dollar in the not-distant past for those beauties!  time to take them back on the road where they - and I - belong.

89 - sunday

this has been an awesome weekend.  it snuck up out of nowhere after the week from h-e-double-hockey-sticks and seemed to last forever: long hours of relaxing, of sunshine, of endless skype conversations with t without having to run off to class or meetings, of ocean swimming, of sipping cocktails with friends. I hardly gave a thought to my schoolwork at all.  perfect summer bliss.

bec and I wrapped up the glorious weekend with lobster rolls and white sangria at one of the waterfront restaurants by the marina in town.  it was the best way to end a picture-perfect summer weekend.

I also got the news this evening that two of my dearest friends, katie and sam, are getting married! I introduced them to one another nearly four years ago, and my heart is just overflowing with love and happiness for them.

88 - saturday

I went back to the farmer's market this morning.  I can't believe it's been a MONTH since I last went!  where does the time get away to?

last time I went, I happened to have a whole mess of cash in my wallet.  not so much today.  I figured I'd limit myself to all the fresh goodness $5 can buy and supplement the rest with a trip to the grocery store this afternoon.  then I discovered fresh bucks.

at the entrance to the market, the organizing group (farm fresh ri) has a tent set up.  you fork over the plastic, tell them how much you want to spend, and they give you these nifty $5 "fresh bucks" tokens.  they are accepted by all the vendors, and if you don't spend the whole $5, you get the difference in cash back.

they never expire.  they satisfy my inner child.  it's chuck-e-cheese kitsch meets local farm exchange wholesomeness.  AND they are accepted at every farmer's market in the state! I bought $50 of fresh bucks and have $20 left over.  hmmm...there is a market on monday nights right around the corner from where I work...

87 - friday

after this long week, I don't know if I have ever been so grateful to see friday morning knowing that the day's to-do list is short and I have a full, quiet weekend ahead.

becca and I took a leap of faith on weather that couldn't seem to decide between mist and sun.  we headed to the beach, where we were rewarded with 90 degree sunshine, a strong, cool wind, and a long swim in the warm, but refreshing, ocean.

after work, I headed to my parents' place for dinner with my sister.  sushi and wine on the patio.  it was a beautiful, warm night.  perfect.

my sis is sitting for our dad's new puppy, django, who is just the sweetest rescue doggie there ever was:

all in all, a much needed wind-down after a long week.  it's definitely helpful (and necessary) to relax a little and regroup before the next week gets underway.

86 - thursday

I have a blood sugar disorder called reactive hypoglycemia.  it's the scientific opposite of diabetes: whereas diabetics don't make enough insulin to properly convert and store blood sugar, I don't make enough glycogen to release the stored sugar back into my blood when my levels get low.  

"is that why you're always eating almonds?" one of my classmates asked me yesterday and the answer is yes: it's because almonds have a low glycemic index and help to hold my blood sugar in a constant happy place.  better yet, they can even help lower my blood glucose level (bgl) after a meal.  superfood!

I almost aaaalways have a baggie of almonds on me, in case I need a quick bgl pick-me-up.  but yesterday I dropped the ball and had nothing.  I went more than 8 hours between meals, not my usual 3-4.  and then I ate half a pizza - sending my bgl soaring and then into a deep crash that, because of my condition, I couldn't get out of.  this resulted in many late night/early morning hours of talking on the big white porcelain telephone and gagging down teensie sips of water and worst of all, missing class.  I'm frustrated with myself because I know better. 

almonds, you're my friend! today sucked, and I'll be doing better by myself in the future.  

85 - wednesday

one of the awesome oddities of the town that I grew up in is that it is home to the kentish guard militia, one of, if not the longest continuously chartered militias in the united states.  they were chartered on october 29, 1774.  now I'm no math genius, but that is a pretty freakin' long time to have been in continuous service.

the fife and drum corps practices every wednesday night at the kentish guard armory, which is just behind the restaurant.  the music is beautiful and the rhythm keeps me rockin' through my stacks of paperwork.  (five minutes of cruising the web turned up this link to buy their cd.  I am tempted.)

I didn't take either of these pictures, unfortunately, because I have been trying since march to get a picture of these guys practicing and every week, by the time I get up to the armory, they're done and have all disappeared.  maybe I will rename them the kentish ninjas. 

84 - tuesday

problem #1: grad school is STRESSFUL.

problem #2: I've needed to go to the grocery store since last saturday, but haven't had time (I am beyond overdue on this one. yikes.)

solution:

wait, not everyone eats nearly an entire pint of froyo and calls it "lunch?"

oh well.  sorry I'm not sorry.  and now that I've knocked off lunch AND some of my stress (mmm, thanks chocolate!) I can get back to work.

(PS - getting sick of my stressed out, bizarrely repetitive grad student diet?  I have a surprise coming in september!)

83 - monday

of all the gimmicky things ever invented, this may be one of the foulest (no pun intended) I have ever seen:

so let's get this straight, dunkin' donuts.  you are going to take your recipes for blue raspberry and orange coolattas (already vile enough on their own) and combine them into a blue rasp-orange "wally the green monster coolatta."  you are going to hope, relying upon a basic understanding of the kindergarten color wheel, that electric blue + sketchy yellow-orange = vibrant green, and sell it for $3 per 18oz.  GROSS.

the person in front of me at the drive-thru actually ordered one of these bizarre concoctions.  it was a vague shade of purplebrown.  sorry about that color-mixing lesson, DD, but props to you for supporting the red sox in these tough times.

82 - sunday

today is a day I've looked forward to for a long time, like the big nerd I am: studying in the restricted access grad student cluster in the library.  as an undergrad, I envied my med school friends who could swipe their IDs and gain access to this mystery room, separated from the main computer cluster by a frosted glass wall.  it was oz for nerds, and I couldn't wait to get in there.  according to the grad school technology website, "the graduate student computer cluster on Level 2 [of the main library] is a refuge of peace and quiet in the midst of what can be a very busy place."

now. this might be true in december, during finals, when all the undergrads are freaking out and the libraries are open 24 hours and every seat is taken.  but it's july, it's sunday, and I'm fairly certain I'm one of maybe a dozen people in the library.  until just a few minutes ago, I was totally alone in the grad room.  I was happily reading and note-taking when another person entered, and of all the unoccupied computers (16), tables (9), and armchairs (6), he decided to sit down next to me at my table.    and sneeze, and sniffle, and slurp and gulp his coffee, and sneeze some more without covering his mouth, and chew and snap his gum, and bang on his computer keys so hard that the whole table shook.

this is solitary confinement.  ten windowless, cinderblock cells with a desk, a chair, and an outlet.  that's it.  there's another row of ten cells in the basement.  it's prison for learning.

this is where most of my thesis and countless other papers were written, and where my GRE and LSAT studying/practice testing went down.  I'm sticking with what I know works: I apparently will be spending my study hours as a grad student here in solitary confinement -- because the grad cluster is anything but the "peaceful haven" I imagined it to be.

81 - saturday

sweet, holy, prayer-answering, apartment-cooling, mind-clearing rain.

last night's thunderstorm was a violent electrical show with terrifying thunder - it only rained a little, and left the air heavy and hot.   but today, my friends, today the rain has arrived, breaking the awful humidity, and bringing with it a strong, cool breeze.  I have been sitting by the window, mesmerized, watching it fall.  I absolutely love storms like this one - I even went outside and splashed around the puddles in my driveway.

80 - friday

I worked late and it's thunderstorming something awful, so I'm spending the night at my parents' house rather than make the half hour commute back to my own place.  when we first moved here, twelve years ago, teenage me was so excited to get my own room and my own bathroom and doors with locks and an awesome closet.  it was paradise.  it was also freezing.  you see, my bedroom is situated right below the air conditioning factory in the attic, so the newly churned icy air always hit me first.  I remember summers when I could stand in the hallway, outside my closed door, and feel the freezing air rushing out from under the gap above the floorboards.

but like all well designed, faithful machines, the air conditioning system has come to the inevitable end of its fifteen-plus years of service.  and...surprise! you can see the outline of it ON MY CEILING because it's leaking water through the vent onto my bedroom floor and into the ceiling and into the attic. oh, what a mess.  thank goodness for homeowner's insurance, right?

79 - thursday

I had an insanely busy day today.  I was up before the sun at 5:00am and didn't have a spare second until my head hit the pillow around 1:00am.

no, this is not last week's picture of patriotic ice cream.  this is today's picture of the only meal I ate all day due to the aforementioned busy schedule.  steel-cut oats (real oatmeal, not that instant garbage) with honey and strawberries.  delicious - and filling enough to keep me going strong, energizer-bunny style.

78 - wednesday

back in 2008, I was working just outside of boston for a big, international public health foundation.  the combination of long work hours with the intensity (and human urgency) of our projects could, at times, be very stressful.  at the stress-relieving suggestion of one of my colleagues, I started practicing bikram yoga 3-4 times a week at the studio near our office in quincy.  it was love at first class.  bikram is practiced in a room heated and humidified between 95-100 degrees, lasts 90 minutes, and consists of 26 poses done twice and bookended by breathing exercises.  the amount of sweat that is produced during this yoga is unrivaled.  I like it because it combines two of my favorite things: intense aerobic exercise, and long, deep stretches.  it's the most complete workout I've ever had.  best of all, when we later moved offices to boston proper, there was another awesome studio just two t stops away.

the bikram pose series

now that I'm through college and no longer working in boston, it's been a struggle to find a studio that's nearby.  there's only one here in rhode island, and the quality of both the instruction and facility pale so much in comparison to the quincy and boston studios that I've honestly only been once.  what I love about the summers here is that the combination of heat and humidity are just right so that I can practice bikram alone, at home, fo' free.  

yoga studio, apartment edition.  

the mirror helps me keep my balance during the standing series - every (real) studio is mirrored on all four walls.  

bow pose is my favorite. 

I hope that by incorporating a more regular yoga practice into my summer routine, I can keep my stress levels lower and be more focused on my classes.

77 - tuesday

today was another one of THESE days...

whyyyy, mother nature, why?!

I lived in tanzania for seven months, and the weather was like this every day.  what made it bearable was the constant, cool breeze that blew in off the indian ocean, and the daily afternoon thunderstorm that cooled off the night.  no such luck today on the east coast of the united states, unfortunately.  this has led me to a state of heat delirium, and prompted all sorts of odd behavior, such as:

last night, I slept on the floor on a towel laid over my yoga mat.  I swear it was at least 5 degrees cooler down there than up on my bed. 

and this morning, I ran a pair of socks under the faucet until they were soaked, then threw them in the freezer.  I realize this is something pregnant ladies do, but this can also be something that extremely overheated non-pregnant ladies do, too.  

anyway, the REAL story is that I had a meeting with my practicum team today, and we finally met our research interns!  they're an incredible group of super motived high school kids from all over the city, working on youth civic engagement and community organizing.  

they come from the toughest of the "failing" schools - schools like Hope High and Central - where more than half of their peers are the children of immigrants who don't speak English at home, where nearly a quarter of their high school class will drop out, where one in four kids will move homes at least once during the school year, who daily face gang violence and the incredible, suffocating social expectation that they will fail no matter how hard they try.  what makes these kids awesome is that they ARE trying, and they ARE succeeding.  most significantly, they are using their own success to serve as positive role models for other kids in their schools and citywide.  I'm very excited to be working with this team for the next month.  

76 - monday

I am hereby declaring myself entitled to two panic attacks this summer.

the first one is happening at this very moment.  I will spare you a detailed, hyperventilating rant about my stress level and my post-marathon mood swings and how many tens of thousands of dollars I am asking the government to loan me to pay for grad school and all of my duedates and timelines and calendars and how hot it is in my apartment and how for the third monday in a row I went to my office with one simple task to do and couldn't, for reasons beyond my control.

after three f*@%ing hours of getting nothing done at work I left the office very calmly and went to my parents' house to feed and let out the dog (they're at the beach for the day, it must be nice!).  I opened the pantry door to get out his kibble, and that's when the blue box special caught my eye.

yes, it's true, I'm (usually) a food snob.  but sometimes there's not a thing in the world that can beat the comfort factor of good old mac n' cheese.  yes, I ate the whole box.  no, I haven't been running in almost a week and have been feeling like a sweaty, stressed, miserable sloth because of it.  but thanks, kraft white cheddar mac,  I feel better already.

I anticipate another meltdown around the end of July when everythingisdueatonce.  don't say you weren't warned.

75 - sunday

happy birthday, america!

ben and rachel win the most patriotically dressed couple award

I went to boston this afternoon to spend some time catching up with friends, enjoying the gorgeous weather, and celebrating our great country.  the boston fireworks are awesome.

this picture doesn't do the awesomeness proper justice, but I tried.

 and now that the 4th is officially behind us... we are into the home stretch! less than one month until t comes home! after this long stint of counting the days since he's been gone, I can start a new countdown of days until he's back in the usa :)